Right before delivery, I always set a goal of nursing for at least six months. I always ask my husband to keep me on track, and keep me motivated to continue nursing for as long as I can. This time, things just didn’t go as planned…

I had my c-section (on our anniversary) and we welcomed our third child. The surgery went well, and we both were doing great. Agnes started nursing right off the bat, and I was feeling pretty confident about my six month goal. We were out of the hospital in just two days, and back home to the boys.

I kept nursing, but something just wasn’t right. Agnes was having trouble latching on, and I was having trouble keeping the boys quiet. I tried everything… I switched rooms to nurse in, different nursing positions, bumped up my eating, but Agnes started losing weight.

We went for her one week check-up, and that was when my Doctor said the dreaded words, it’s time to supplement. She told me to keep pumping, and try to keep my supply up. I felt like a failure, and I was really sad. I have a fantastic Doctor, and she reassured me that everything would be fine.

I went out and bought bottles, along with preemie clothes for Agnes, and went home and made a bottle for her. James was happy to feed Agnes her first bottle, and I attempted to pump for the next feeding. I got out my trusty pump, and I pumped barely 1/4 of an ounce. The problem wasn’t her not being able to nurse, it was me…

At the second week check-up my Doctor figured out that my hormones never kicked-in to nurse, thanks in part to my c-section, and stress too. Nursing just wouldn’t be an option this time around, but she reassured me that Agnes would do just fine, and seeing the rapid weight gain, made be a believer too.

I still feel a little sad that I’m not able to nurse this time around, but seeing my little girl cheerful, and growing, it is all worth it.